From My Inner Library
Reflections and excerpts from a lived yogic and human path
Excerpt from the book manuscript: Living Sadhana
Why Extraordinary People Stop — And Why It Breaks My Heart
Dear reader,
There is something I have witnessed again and again over more than thirty years of working 1:1 with clients.
As a movement teacher.
As a bodyworker.
As an Ayurvedic specialist.
As a yoga therapist.
And in the last decade especially — as an Ayurveda–Yoga coach.
I have seen extraordinary people stop investing in themselves — not because they lacked potential, intelligence, or strength.
But because they hit a low-energy state.
A virus.
Sleep deprivation.
Stress from work.
Family pressure.
Financial fear.
Or an old, deep-seated belief that quietly whispers:
“Maybe this isn’t for you.”
“Maybe this is too much.”
“Maybe now is not the time.”
It makes my heart bleed every time.
Because in 99% of the cases, “I don’t have time right now”
or
“I don’t have money right now”
is not the real reason.
The real reason is usually fear of growth.
Fear of change.
Fear of becoming more visible.
Fear of stepping into one’s full potential.
A year ago I wrote a newsletter about this pattern.
Today, I want to share one of the central chapters from my manuscript Living Sadhana.
Please read it carefully.
You cannot only apply this wisdom when resistance arises in your yoga practice.
You can apply it when you want to stop your Ayurvedic health journey.
When you hesitate to continue coaching.
When your environment does not support your growth.
When your family doesn’t understand why you are investing in yourself.
When self-doubt gets louder than your inner knowing.
✧ Beginning of Excerpt from My Inner Library ✧
What If Chapter: When You Want To Give Up
Challenges Are Chances To Grow
The One You Confront in Yoga Is Yourself
“The one you confront in Yoga is yourself. All that is rigid and stiff, all that says ‘No.’”
— Frederick Leboyer
Practicing Yoga, you learn how to take setbacks gracefully without giving up. Like a dancer who knows how to rise gracefully after a fall, or like a soccer player celebrating his comeback after an injury, a Yoga practitioner knows that challenges are always temporary and there is no reason to stop.
With time and practice, you will learn about your physical and mental limitations. Practicing satya, or truthfulness, you become aware of pre-programmed belief systems that keep you from reaching your higher aspirations.
When you face an inner resistance or an outer challenge
that could keep you from practicing Yoga,
the process of Yoga has begun.
Now you are ready to dig into the next layer of your conditioning and decide what you want to keep and what you would like to discard.
Reason 1: You Start To Feel Better (And Forget Why You Started)
In the beginning of a new endeavor, we are usually excited and motivated. But as the newness starts to wear off, we run the danger of slacking off. What you do for a long time becomes habitual. And this is what we want! It is our goal that your daily Yoga becomes a habit.
Yet sometimes you might lose sight of why you started with Yoga in the first place. When you start to feel better, your willingness to spend extra time and effort is often not that great anymore, and your focus might start to shift away from taking care of yourself.
This is a big error.
Remember: feeling better is exactly what you want! So keep on going.
Reason 2: You Are Changing (And Change Feels Uncomfortable)
Yoga is a path of healing and awakening. Healing is always transformation.
Slowly and over time, you become more and more sensitive to what is really going on inside of you and also around you. You don’t feel like eating that hamburger for lunch anymore and prefer a green juice and veggie sandwich instead. You have a hard time tolerating cigarette smoke, and you feel tipsy after one glass of wine. Your sense of smell changes, and you become more sensitive to people’s body odor and perfumes. You start to feel content with what is instead of always wanting more.
With one word: you are changing.
You feel exhilarated and insecure at the same time. The basic physiology of your brain is wired that way.
The brain registers familiar behavior, people, or actions and labels them as safe. Our brain is programmed to help us survive, but our inherent nature wants us to grow and evolve. Your instinct to react to change with fear might be natural — but it is not justified.
The opposite is often true: when you stick with unhealthy, old ways, your body and psyche will eventually suffer. Resisting the natural process of growth will cause more pain and unpleasantness in the long run.
Bailing out of the process of Yoga at times of crisis only means more challenges later on.
Reason 3: You Discover New Ways (And Resistance Arises)
Yoga and Ayurveda practices open up blockages of prana and free you to more fully express your true nature. When you start to resist, you become rigid and stiff again.
What should you do when challenges arise during your Yoga journey?
You keep on going.
You keep on going until what you are experiencing in the moment shifts and changes again.
Yoga is always a moment-to-moment journey.
Nothing is permanent, and the sensations and emotions you experience now are always transient. They won’t stay forever — especially if you don’t try to analyze them and create stories in your mind about why they exist.
Enjoy the ride. Discovering new ways of being makes you feel alive! Yoga is about stretching yourself in more than one way. Over time, you will see what is truly possible and what you are physically and mentally capable of.
Go with the flow and open up to change! Know that this emotion of unease will also pass.
Reason 4: You Start To Detox (Body, Mind, and Emotions)
Yoga and Ayurveda sadhana free your body from long-held tension patterns and mental rigidity. Therefore, Yoga and meditation can possibly trigger unresolved memories and trauma in your body and psyche.
Purification processes accompany a regular Yoga practice and are normal — even welcome.
Physically, you might notice that your body odor changes; you taste differently; you become more sensitive to smells; and you see everything more crisp and clear.
When you start to let go of muscle tension, you may experience aches that haven’t been there before. And when you begin to relax, you might discover exhaustion you didn’t know you had.
When you start to give to yourself, receiving might bring up all kinds of emotions. I have seen this in clients, and for some it can be a scary, new feeling to open up to self-love and care.
I would advise you to seek professional help if you cannot cope with what comes up for you. Ayurveda–Yoga coaching and lessons are not a substitute for therapy.
In my own career as a teacher and Ayurvedic specialist, however, I have rarely seen anyone who wasn’t able to deal with the changes triggered by the practice. Transformation happens over time and often seems unrelated to the Yoga practice itself.
Doing some daily journaling and talking to your teacher or fellow Yogis can be sufficient. The combination of Ayurveda, Yoga, and Coaching is ideal because it supports you in integrating changes on both a personal and professional level. The combination of these three sciences can save you a lot of time and trouble.
How To Be With What Arises
Allow yourself to feel what arises.
With no story attached.
Stay with the pure feeling.
It is a doorway to compassion and healing.
Give space to whatever physical sensations and emotional upheavals come up for you. Practice watching without judging. Practice detaching yourself from the thoughts that keep fueling the story and the emotions that spring forth from it.
Be compassionate with the feeling that arises. Embrace it instead of resisting it. There is no need to look for stories to explain physical sensations or emotions. Just be with them — and they will pass.
If physical pain arises that persists, seek the advice of a teacher and make an appointment with a health care professional.
✧ End of Excerpt ✧
The Real Question Underneath: Am I Worth It?
What I understand today even more clearly than when I wrote these words is this:
Resistance is not a sign to stop.
It is a threshold.
Over decades of working with people in private sessions, I have seen how often growth intensifies right before someone wants to quit.
Low energy states distort perception. Exhaustion magnifies fear. Financial numbers suddenly look bigger. Time feels scarcer.
I recently had a conversation with a client.
Nothing dramatic. No crisis.
Just “the number day” — when the next payment was due.
And suddenly doubt appeared.
“Is it worth it?” “Is it too much?” “Should I pause?”
Underneath that question was the deeper one:
Am I worth it?
Often it is not really about money.
It is about value. Self-worth. Belonging. Standing out when others around you are not doing this kind of work. Continuing when family members don’t understand. Choosing growth when your environment prefers comfort.
What Happens When You Stay (Instead of Quit)
Every time someone continues despite that voice, something inside them grows stronger.
Every time someone stops because of it, something inside them shrinks.
And that is what breaks my heart.
Because I have seen what happens when people stay.
They stabilize. They become clearer. Their business decisions improve. Their relationships soften. Their health strengthens. Their nervous system regulates. Their confidence becomes embodied.
Not overnight.
But steadily.
Three Reflections for You
- Where in your life are you tempted to stop — not because it is wrong, but because it is uncomfortable?
- What excuse has your mind been repeating lately?
- If you removed fear from the equation, what would you choose to continue?
Growth Begins Exactly Where You Want To Stop
Do not let temporary low-energy states make permanent decisions for your life.
Do not let doubt, exhaustion, or financial fear convince you that growth is unnecessary.
Do not let the voice inside your head that wants to keep you small and safe decide your future.
Growth is rarely comfortable.
But stopping because of fear is even more costly.
You are not meant to stay where you once were.
You are meant to expand.
And sometimes expansion begins exactly at the moment when you want to give up.
Ready for Steady, Structured Support?
If this speaks to you and you feel you need structured, steady guidance — not motivation, but rhythm — you can explore my 1:1 Ayurveda–Yoga Coaching here:
If this speaks to you and you feel you need structured, steady guidance — not motivation, but rhythm — you can explore my 1:1 Ayurveda–Yoga Coaching here:
With honesty and deep care,
Verena Gayatri Primus
About the Author
Verena Gayatri Primus is an Ayurvedic specialist, yoga teacher, writer, and mentor with over three decades of lived experience on the yogic and human path. A former professional dancer, she has spent many years studying and practicing yoga, Ayurveda, and meditation, including time in ashrams and extended journeys through India.
Through her work, Verena supports people in cultivating physical health, mental clarity, emotional maturity, and spiritual depth — not as an escape from life, but as a way to live it more fully. From My Inner Library is a space where she shares lived reflections, stories, and teachings shaped by practice, love, loss, and renewal.
You’ll find all the details of my 1:1 Coaching Path here:
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